Corruption
by Thesseli
Summary: The truth is far worse than Lothar ever could have imagined. The sequel to 'Guardian', which is the sequel to 'The Once and Future King'. [M/M, Liontrust]
1. Chapter 1

The ceremony in Dalaran could not have gone more smoothly. And Lothar didn't know whether to be relieved or concerned.

Three days ago, Khadgar had been made Guardian of Azeroth by the Kirin Tor. So far, Lothar hadn't seen any major changes in him. Lothar hadn't really known what to expect…he knew Khadgar wouldn't be reckless enough to reveal his corruption in front of the dignitaries of Azeroth, but neither would he have predicted things would return to normal afterwards. Or rather, as normal as things could be, with Khadgar corrupted by the Fel. No, they'd both returned to their regular duties, fighting to save Azeroth by day and secretly spending their nights together in the regent king's bed.

Just as they had before they'd killed Medivh.

But Khadgar had definitely changed. Lothar wondered if the younger man had always possessed the ruthless streak he now showed so readily; if he had, his conscience had probably kept it in check. Other people put it down to the stress of the war against the orcs, but Lothar knew better, even if he was powerless to warn anyone about the new Guardian's corruption.

Even so, most of the time the younger man didn't act any differently than he'd been before the Fel. Not like Medivh, who'd had memory lapses and numerous incidents when he couldn't control his temper…as well as when he'd literally turned into a demon. Khadgar still seemed very much in control of himself, even though he was now more ruthless and self-serving than he'd been in the past. The orcs who'd been unlucky enough to cross their path on their journey back to Stormwind had learned this the hard way, with Khadgar raining fire down upon them. The mage had expanded his spell range considerably, adding the powers of fire and frost to the arcane abilities he normally wielded.

The fire spells seemed particularly harsh, even to Lothar. They didn't give quick, clean deaths like an arcane bolt or a well-placed arrow or blade. But Lothar assumed that the smell of charred orc flesh would discourage any more attacks on their way home.

"I want them to fear us," Khadgar explained. "I want them to think twice about ever coming near anyone from the Alliance again."

Lothar nodded grimly, knowing Khadgar was right. It just hurt to see the younger man so coldhearted, so calculating. There was a time when thoughts like these never would have crossed Khadgar's mind.

Khadgar had changed. It was glaringly obvious to Lothar, even though no-one else could see it. And the worst part of it all was that, even with the changes, Lothar could still see the man Khadgar had been. He could only pray that he could somehow get through to the mage, convince him to give up the Fel and go back to how he used to be.

If that was even possible.

"Don't look so sad, Anduin," Khadgar said, coming up behind Lothar that night and wrapping his arms around him. He kissed the older man's bare shoulder. "Things are only going to get better now that I'm the Guardian. Easier, for both of us. I'm not like Medivh. You'll see."

Even Fel-corrupted, Khadgar never seemed bothered when Lothar spoke his mind. No matter what he said or did, not even when the mage had first revealed his corruption to Lothar and had nearly gotten a blade through his heart in response. And even afterwards – when Lothar found he couldn't harm Khadgar because of whatever spell the mage had placed on him – Khadgar had listened calmly to his cursing and his threats with nothing more than a disappointed look on his face. Khadgar had said then that he still wanted only the truth from Lothar, Fel or no Fel.

Lothar rested a hand over Khadgar's and sighed wearily, speaking the truth the mage had requested all those months ago. "I just wish everything was normal again."

Khadgar rested his forehead against Lothar's back, and there was the faintest trace of regret when he spoke again. "So do I."

Lothar turned around and gazed at him pleadingly. "It can be. You can end this. Renounce the Fel, purge it from yourself like you did with Medivh, and we can go back to living our regular lives."

He shook his head. "I can't do that."

"Why not? Are you that addicted to all the power you have now, 'Guardian'?" Lothar was frustrated, and right now he wanted Khadgar to know it.

"It's not like that," he insisted.

"You were the Novitiate for how long before you left the Kirin Tor? You trained for this for years. You really expect me to believe that you never wanted this?"

Khadgar's brow furrowed. "Oh, it's true. I've thought about becoming the Guardian every day since Medivh's death. I desired it…I've yearned for Gul'dan and his Horde to cringe before the fury I would unleash on them." He actually looked distressed now. "But that's not the reason I took the Fel, or the Guardianship."

"You keep saying that, but you never tell me why," Lothar shot back.

"I needed them both." Khadgar's voice had taken on a hard edge.

"You 'needed' the Fel, and you 'needed' the powers of the Guardian too. The Guardianship I can see, but the Fel? Why? Why take that into yourself when you know what it can do, when you've seen what it did to Medivh? How could you do this to yourself?"

"I had to."

"You didn't have to do anything, Khadgar."

"It was necessary."

"We can beat the orcs without the Fel—"

"I know that."

"—and using it makes us no better than they are!"

The green fire flared angrily in Khadgar's eyes. "I did it to save you!" Then, seemingly shocked by his own admission, he flinched away from Lothar's incredulous stare.

"What do you mean?" he demanded. Khadgar shrank back almost fearfully, but Lothar grabbed his shoulders. He couldn't hurt Khadgar, but he could still hold him in place. "You tell me exactly what you meant," he said, his voice a low growl.

"Anduin, please…I shouldn't have said anything, you shouldn't have to deal with this, I wanted to spare you—"

"If I was in any way involved with your decision to accept the Fel, then I damn well deserve to know why!"

Khadgar closed his eyes, then nodded wearily in defeat. "All right. But only because I can't bear the way you look at me now…maybe if you know the truth, you'll stop looking at me like I'm some kind of monster."

Lothar continued to glare at him for another few seconds. Then his expression softened, and he squeezed Khadgar's shoulders briefly before releasing him. "Thank you."

Khadgar gazed at him solemnly. "I'll have to show you."

"Show me?" Lothar repeated, as he felt Khadgar's control – what he'd likened to an iron band around his mind – shift, just slightly. "What do you have to show—"


	2. Chapter 2

Felfire erupted around them. No, not around them…around him. There was no pain, though, and Lothar realized it was only a vision, an illusion. It wasn't really there, but he tried to pull back anyway. He couldn't.

"What is this?" Lothar grated out, unable to move.

"This is what happened in Karazhan, Anduin," Khadgar said softly. "I wasn't able to protect you. And for that I am sorry. So very, very sorry."

"What do you mean?"

The mage's expression was grim. "You were badly injured in the fight with Medivh. Between that and all the Fel energy swirling around you, you were…contaminated. I wasn't able to stop it."

"What?" he replied. "No. That's impossible, I would remember."

"The Fel can cloud the mind, Anduin. It did it to Medivh, and it did it to you too. Most of the time Medivh wasn't even aware of his own corruption, but it was still inside him. Just like it's inside you."

"I am not corrupted by the Fel," Lothar insisted, staring at the mage through the haze of green.

Khadgar shook his head. "I'm sorry, Anduin, but you are. It's only my magic that's keeping it in check, hiding it."

There was a sick feeling in the pit of Lothar's stomach. "I don't believe you."

"Listen to me, Anduin. I couldn't get to you in time, I couldn't prevent the contamination. It had already started to change you, just like it changed Medivh."

"No."

The remorse on Khadgar's face was clear. "I knew I would have to show you. And again, Anduin…I'm sorry."

The iron band around Lothar's mind loosened again, ever so slightly, and a wave of agony seared through him. And through the pain, he could feel the Fel itself…feel the first green swirls of that twisted energy burning in his eyes, before it erupted out and through the rest of his body. Impossibly, the pain worsened, concentrating in his head, back, and legs. No longer able to stand, Lothar dropped to his knees.

And then Khadgar was kneeling beside him, cradling him in his arms as the newly released Fel tore through his body and remade it.

The pain faded to a dull ache, rivulets of blood trickling down Lothar's head and back.

With a shaky hand, Lothar reached up, feeling the horns that now grew from his forehead. He didn't need to see the wings; he could tell they were there by the shift in his weight. And given how painful the rest of the transformation had been, he'd barely noticed his lower legs reshaping themselves, or the hooves they now ended in.

"What am I?" he asked numbly.

"What Medivh became when the Fel took him over," Khadgar said regretfully. "A demon."

He shivered. "Why didn't you just kill me?"

"I couldn't," Khadgar whispered, closing his eyes. "I love you too much."

"If you really loved me, I'd be dead now," Lothar spat. "How could you let me live, knowing this is what I'd become?"

Khadgar shook his head again. "There was…another option."

Lothar regarded him skeptically, through what he now knew were burning green eyes. "Which was?"

"The only thing I could do that would keep you alive, but not a threat." Khadgar paused, and Lothar could not only see, but sense, the Fel flickering within the other man's eyes. "Demons can be bound. But to bind a demon, I needed the Fel in me too. Like Gul'dan and his warlocks have. So…I took it."

Lothar was still in shock. "How did you even know how to do that?"

"I learned in Dalaran, studying books and tomes that were prohibited, locked away where students couldn't get to them. But I could never resist forbidden knowledge. You never know when it might come in handy," he stated. "How did you think I was controlling you? That's not arcane magic. Mages can't control humans like that, you should have known that from Medivh. But they can control demons. That's why you can't hurt me, and why you're compelled to do what I say if I give you an order."

Lothar frowned. "And that would make you…" He couldn't say any more.

"A warlock, as well as a mage." Khadgar sat back against the side of the bed. "I accepted the Fel so I could bind you, because otherwise I would have had to kill you. And I never could have done that. This was the only way I knew to control you, to keep you from hurting anyone. Because if you weren't bound, this is what you'd be feeling."

Again, Lothar felt the band around his mind relax slightly. But this time, a burning anger rose within him. Anger at Khadgar. It was the mage's fault that this had happened to him, that he was no longer human, that he'd become the very thing he hated most. He wanted to make Khadgar pay, he wanted to rip him apart with his bare hands…

He clutched at his head, trying to let the pain ground him, trying to fight back against whatever part of himself was telling him to murder the man he loved.

"You see now why this was the only way?" Khadgar asked gently. "I couldn't kill you, and I couldn't let you kill me either. And you definitely would have killed me – along with the rest of your family and friends – if I hadn't done this."

"Please, no more," begged Lothar, horrified at the emotions he was experiencing, as well as his certainty that he would have acted upon them if he hadn't been bound. "Make it stop, Khadgar, please—"

And then suddenly he felt Khadgar's will lock those urges down once more, pushing them down so deep he could no longer feel them. And once it was over, the mage was at his side again, brushing his hair back from his forehead tenderly.

"Do you understand now why I had to take the Fel, Anduin?" Khadgar asked. "I had to protect you. I couldn't let you go, and I couldn't bear to kill you. This was the only way." The mage kissed him, and then chanted a few words in a language Lothar didn't recognize, but that he could somehow understand. A few moments later the residual pain was gone, the bleeding had stopped, and – thankfully – the aberrant body parts had returned to their normal human state. "I can heal you now, because you're bound to me," he explained, although he appeared visibly weakened by the act. "Actually, I've been doing it on the battlefield for a while now – funneling some of my own health to you, whenever your injuries were bad, but not to the point where it would be obvious."

"You should have just let me die," Lothar said bitterly.

Khadgar shook his head. "Azeroth needs you. I need you."

Lothar swallowed hard, wiping some of the blood from his forehead. "Why did I want to hurt you?"

"Because that's what demons do," the mage replied, taking the other man's hand. "I'm holding that in for you so it doesn't come out, just like I'm doing with your new form. I can keep you looking and acting and thinking like your normal self."

"Thank you," he murmured. He felt an overwhelming sense of guilt at what had passed through him just minutes before. "You know I would never want to hurt you, right?"

Khadgar smiled slightly. "I know. That's the Fel, not you. It did the same thing to the orcs – it changed them, physically and mentally. Gul'dan encouraged it in them…but I won't let it do the same to you." He leaned up against Lothar. "I needed the Fel to control you, and the powers of the Guardian to expand my mana pool so I could maintain that control more easily…as well as to extend my own lifespan. Guardians can live for centuries. That way…that way you won't be a danger to anyone if I die before you do. Because if I die, you will no longer be bound." Khadgar squeezed Lothar's hand. "And as an added benefit, a longer lifespan will hopefully buy me enough time to figure out how to undo what happened to you."

He arched an eyebrow. "You really think that's possible?"

"I do."

Lothar frowned. "How is the Fel not doing to you what it did to me and Medivh?"

"It's different for me," Khadgar said. "You were contaminated by it accidentally, so there was no rhyme or reason or purpose to how it got inside you, or what it did to you afterwards. I deliberately took it in, in a very precise manner. I'm still affected by it, of course, you've seen that." For a brief moment, Khadgar looked ashamed. "You wouldn't have still been you if I hadn't bound you. But me? I'm…well, I'm as close to what I used to be as is possible, given the circumstances." He sighed. "I know I've changed. That's why I need you to keep being honest with me. I don't want to get lost like Medivh did; I need you to lead me back." His eyes held Lothar's, brown meeting blue, and in that moment he looked and sounded like the man he'd always been. "Right now, I need you just as much as you need me. That's why you have to keep telling me the truth…to anchor me to who I used to be."

Lothar nodded somberly. Suddenly he was overwhelmed. He was already damned, thanks to the Fel. And Khadgar…Khadgar had willingly damned himself because of it. Because of him.

As if he could sense Lothar's distress, Khadgar wrapped his arms around him. Lothar allowed himself to take what little comfort he could, and clutched at Khadgar as if his life depended on it.

"…you'll keep me from hurting anyone, won't you?" he whispered, closing his eyes tightly and leaning into the other man. Exhausted, all he wanted to do right now was sleep.

Khadgar held him close. "I'll keep you from hurting anyone, I promise," he said solemnly. "As long as you promise you'll do the same for me."


End file.
